From: Six Sigma Green Belt Zealot, Gaia-Centric Thought Leader, Cubicle Recycling Gold Medalist
We -- I/we/zhe use plural pronouns -- are applying to adopt a lab rat. We believe that we meet all EPA "suitable, sustainable and equitable parenting" criteria and would provide our rat with a loving family unit and a hate-free environment. We already have a guinea pig, Elrond, which identifies as a genderqueer squirrel, and it is thriving. Elrond -- and all domestic rodents in our household -- wear tiny, fitted N95 masks just like ours. Each morning, we say a Stolen Habitrail Acknowledgement. In full transparency, we do admit that in a tragic accident, our last pet rodent, Queen Ratifah, was fed to a ball python by our nephew (who is animal empathy deficient and has end stage Oppositional Defiance Disorder) while we were away at Coachella. He's been sent to a lock down inpatient facility and that will not happen again. We have already knitted a kente cloth travel sweater for our rat and will teach it to shun all rats, mice and hamsters owned by Trump voters. We do have one non-negotiable: we cannot adopt a white rat. White rat privilege and supremacy have no place in our home.
University Ponzi schemes being defunded is music to my ears. All federal grants for social science research and hard science research where the research is being hi-jacked by wokeness needs to end, along with all funds and grants to Universities for any reason, including student loans, where the university discriminates against Jews, Asians, white males, students with merit, and women who are forced to play against girl boys.
I suspect most Universities will fail the test and all of the nation’s universities designated as Research Universities will fail.
Starve the haters. Universities are about learning. Time to teach.
I like your comment, but it would have been even better if you had stopped at "along with all funds and grants to Universities for any reason."
As one of the people who wrote the Constitution, perhaps you could point to the section that authorizes expenditure of federal taxpayer funds for any "educational" purpose.
We lost the Constitution’s “general welfare” clause battle long ago. But you may recall both Jefferson and Madison were initially reluctant or opposed federal infrastructure spending, and then they both later approved federal spending on infrastructure, such as roads, harbors, light houses, … etc., so I suspect they would not approve grants and government funded R&D at public and private universities.
Jefferson had significant reservations about the constitutionality of federal funding for "internal improvements" like the National Road. He believed that the federal government needed a constitutional amendment to have such authority. While he signed the bill, it was under a "compact" that allowed him to approve the legislation. He also advocated for a constitutional amendment that would explicitly grant Congress the power to fund internal improvements and education, but this proposal was not acted upon by Congress.
US Route 40 more or less follows the original roadway called the National Road which was part gravel, part logs, part planks, had fords constructed, and much later added bridges. Brownsville on US40 gave access to the Mongahela River and thereby, the Ohio and Allegheny Rivers, and of course the Mississippi River.
Hamilton advocated for such infrastructure, but Hamilton wanted the government to build the economic prosperity of the nation by constructing port facilities, canals, and reliable inland road systems, as both a patriot and a banker.
This means Harvard has more than twice as many full-time administrators as full-time professors. Administrative staffing has grown much faster than faculty numbers in recent decades, with a 43% increase in administrators since 2004, compared to only an 11% increase in faculty.
I'm sorry, but 'adopt a lab rat' brought more than a smile. I'm cleaning my keyboard even as I type. Well, not really, but I would be. Sh-shiminee crickets.
Our son is the maintenance supervisor for a property management company. One of their tenants 'adopted some love' in the form of pet rats. They must have really loved their rats, and the rats must have really loved each other, because, by the time the tenants were evicted, the apartment and the interior space between the walls of the adjoining apartments were full of the rats and generations of their progeny. The neighbors did not love the rats and a major pest eradication project destroyed all the love.
Anthony's satire hits too close to home. I owned property in the Peoples Republic of California that was leased to a mining company. The county bureaucrats were worse than the EPA. They demanded analysis of water at levels BELOW the limits of detection.
All this taxpayer-funded "scientific and scholarly research" gives us the sinister warning to "Trust the science because the science is settled." With fewer tax dollars perhaps we'll get more honest scientific inquiry.
Where's Tracy Thompson when I need her?
Instead of a lab rat peering out of its glass enclosure, the picture should be of an EPA bureau-rat peering out its cubicle.
She would not approve of her cats adopting mice. Nobody, except Jonathan Swift, approves ofneatint one's children...even ifbthrybste adopted.
It doesn't appear to be possible to post images here. That's unfortunate.
I’m certain she has the correct photo for whatever the occasion happens to be 🤠
To spite us, the universities will kill many valuable programs and leave the political basket-weaving alone.
To: EPA Rodent Board of Adoption Approval
From: Six Sigma Green Belt Zealot, Gaia-Centric Thought Leader, Cubicle Recycling Gold Medalist
We -- I/we/zhe use plural pronouns -- are applying to adopt a lab rat. We believe that we meet all EPA "suitable, sustainable and equitable parenting" criteria and would provide our rat with a loving family unit and a hate-free environment. We already have a guinea pig, Elrond, which identifies as a genderqueer squirrel, and it is thriving. Elrond -- and all domestic rodents in our household -- wear tiny, fitted N95 masks just like ours. Each morning, we say a Stolen Habitrail Acknowledgement. In full transparency, we do admit that in a tragic accident, our last pet rodent, Queen Ratifah, was fed to a ball python by our nephew (who is animal empathy deficient and has end stage Oppositional Defiance Disorder) while we were away at Coachella. He's been sent to a lock down inpatient facility and that will not happen again. We have already knitted a kente cloth travel sweater for our rat and will teach it to shun all rats, mice and hamsters owned by Trump voters. We do have one non-negotiable: we cannot adopt a white rat. White rat privilege and supremacy have no place in our home.
University Ponzi schemes being defunded is music to my ears. All federal grants for social science research and hard science research where the research is being hi-jacked by wokeness needs to end, along with all funds and grants to Universities for any reason, including student loans, where the university discriminates against Jews, Asians, white males, students with merit, and women who are forced to play against girl boys.
I suspect most Universities will fail the test and all of the nation’s universities designated as Research Universities will fail.
Starve the haters. Universities are about learning. Time to teach.
Universities began with theology, which has been replaced with leftist politics. Back to teaching, not preaching leftist dogma!
I like your comment, but it would have been even better if you had stopped at "along with all funds and grants to Universities for any reason."
As one of the people who wrote the Constitution, perhaps you could point to the section that authorizes expenditure of federal taxpayer funds for any "educational" purpose.
Can we really describe what goes on in our K through college school system as 'education?'
We lost the Constitution’s “general welfare” clause battle long ago. But you may recall both Jefferson and Madison were initially reluctant or opposed federal infrastructure spending, and then they both later approved federal spending on infrastructure, such as roads, harbors, light houses, … etc., so I suspect they would not approve grants and government funded R&D at public and private universities.
Jefferson had significant reservations about the constitutionality of federal funding for "internal improvements" like the National Road. He believed that the federal government needed a constitutional amendment to have such authority. While he signed the bill, it was under a "compact" that allowed him to approve the legislation. He also advocated for a constitutional amendment that would explicitly grant Congress the power to fund internal improvements and education, but this proposal was not acted upon by Congress.
US Route 40 more or less follows the original roadway called the National Road which was part gravel, part logs, part planks, had fords constructed, and much later added bridges. Brownsville on US40 gave access to the Mongahela River and thereby, the Ohio and Allegheny Rivers, and of course the Mississippi River.
Hamilton advocated for such infrastructure, but Hamilton wanted the government to build the economic prosperity of the nation by constructing port facilities, canals, and reliable inland road systems, as both a patriot and a banker.
Harvard has options.... (Thank you AI).
Comparison Table: Harvard University (2021-22)
Category Number
Full-time administrators 10,120
Full-time instructional staff 3,899
Full-time faculty (alternate source) 2,130–2,400
This means Harvard has more than twice as many full-time administrators as full-time professors. Administrative staffing has grown much faster than faculty numbers in recent decades, with a 43% increase in administrators since 2004, compared to only an 11% increase in faculty.
As a Harvard alum, I hope the next step will be a reparations program for grads....
I'm sorry, but 'adopt a lab rat' brought more than a smile. I'm cleaning my keyboard even as I type. Well, not really, but I would be. Sh-shiminee crickets.
Our son is the maintenance supervisor for a property management company. One of their tenants 'adopted some love' in the form of pet rats. They must have really loved their rats, and the rats must have really loved each other, because, by the time the tenants were evicted, the apartment and the interior space between the walls of the adjoining apartments were full of the rats and generations of their progeny. The neighbors did not love the rats and a major pest eradication project destroyed all the love.
Ack
Maybe a hard look at prof salary structure is in order. How many $1000000+ salaries. How many profs are worth that kind of money?
Anthony's satire hits too close to home. I owned property in the Peoples Republic of California that was leased to a mining company. The county bureaucrats were worse than the EPA. They demanded analysis of water at levels BELOW the limits of detection.
We solemnly swear that we will kill all our cancer research programs before we terminate a single DEI administrator.
There's nothing so nourishing as sucking off the federal government's tit.
All this taxpayer-funded "scientific and scholarly research" gives us the sinister warning to "Trust the science because the science is settled." With fewer tax dollars perhaps we'll get more honest scientific inquiry.